When was the last time you showed kindness towards a colleague at work?
Kindness may seem unimportant or inconsequential at the workplace. After all, it is an emotion typically associated with response to others’ woes or suffering. Kindness plays a very important role in the workplace, especially for leaders.
When I first began practising and studying leadership, I noticed that there were only a handful of books that outlined the importance and attributes of a compassionate leader.
Born and raised in the Spiritual Capital of the World – India, I’d been exposed to a diverse range of religions and philosophies ever since I was young. Each one, regardless of the culture or place of origin, endorsed this one attribute of great leaders – Kindness.
Over the last few years, corporate leaders have increasingly emphasized kindness as a crucial tenet of your work environment. So, what makes it crucial? In my opinion, there are three underlying factors at play:
1. Genuineness begets productivity and performance
Good leaders are genuine. They are not afraid to be helpful. They’re mindful of the needs of their employees. They choose employee health over unrealistic targets. Moreover, what they get in return are proactive employees who surprise them with overachievement.
Compassion and wisdom go hand-in-hand. However, that does not mean leaders need to consistently appear tough and results-driven, so much so that employees feel distanced.
Then, the question is: How can a leader demonstrate kindness? Is compassion the same as submission? How does a leader manifest genuine kindness without appearing to be weak?
The answer lies in sincerity. As John Gerzema, American CEO, Columnist and Book Author puts it, “Transparency, honesty, kindness, good stewardship, and even humour, work in businesses at all times.” When a leader acts in earnest, she/he forges a work environment where people derive joy from their work. When a leader is genuine, she/he nurtures an environment where people are working, learning and growing while experiencing a sense of happiness and fulfilment.
2. Perceiving people kindly wins half the battle
Compassionate leaders perceive people kindly. They view their colleagues, peers and subordinates, as human beings who have the potential to understand. If you have preconceived notions of someone being a difficult person, or if you’re already half-expecting them to misunderstand you, there are high chances that you will lose either the politeness, or honesty, or both those features from your dialogue.
Also, that will not fetch the desired results.
Another attribute that kindness demands is honesty. Honesty doesn’t mean being superficially loyal to an organization or avoiding a lie. It goes beyond that – to be our genuine selves at all times. When leaders say what they must in a genuinely polite manner, even critical and constructive feedback is taken as a delightful surprise.
At the workplace, the larger goal may be the tangible growth of the company. So growth is only possible when employees are both efficient and happy. This is where a leader needs to apply stern kindness.
Let me share an example. Say, an employee is not progressing due to their insufficiency, a mentor needs to be stern. This doesn’t mean screaming at or humiliating the employee, but to offer intense training. For example, if an employee is disorganized, finding creative ways to train that employee in organized behaviour, in a way that it becomes a part of her/him and leads to a fulfilling and efficient lifestyle even outside of work.
3. Leaders connect and engage better as friends and mentors
Leaders need to keep their biases and baggage aside to create a thriving workplace. Creating a culture of kindness, a circle of trust at the workplace leads to building organizations that are transparent at the very core.
Leaders who embrace kindness are the ones that are easy to communicate with, who are sought out by employees to discuss difficulties, instead of being lied to. Leaders who demonstrate kindness are friends and mentors first, over anything else.
When a leader values the happiness of people, they feel appreciated. They feel valued. They feel respected. Moreover, this makes them feel truly connected and engaged. In Dalai Lama’s words, “The ultimate source of a happy life is warm-heartedness.”
To sum up, it’s no accident that organizations with more kind leaders have stronger connections between people, better camaraderie and collaboration, more trust, a stronger commitment to the organization, and lower attrition. A useful read is the book “Kindness In Leadership”, by Gay Haskins, Mike Thomas & Lalit Johri and I had the fortune of being associated with some of the research on this book project.
Finally, kindness is being recognized as an imperative in the workplace. With increasing evidence that leaders benefit with being kind and empathetic, organizations are putting the “human” back in the workplace with a new-found focus on practising compassion and mindfulness for others.